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I’ll Know I’ve “Made It” When…
I can make a living doing the things that I love. I have a museum membership. I do classy stuff like “go to the theatre” or “buy organic produce” on a regular basis. I own a dog. I live without...
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Splitting at the Seams
Currently keeping the holiday blues at bay by googling my Art Historical crush, Gordon Matta Clark (or, as I like to call him, Gordon HOT-ta Clark). Because nothing’s sexier than a man with a full...
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Girl Power (And Not in the Spice Girls Kind of Way)
These ladies are pretty much who I want to be. I know, I know, I say that all of the time– but a lot of things inspire me, okay? And three of those things are: Los Angeles, the 1930s, and badass...
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How to Karaoke Like a Pro Amateur Singer (Or, How to Uncover Your Inner Diva)
First things first: I have never been a “wild child.” During my teen years, I was a dedicated captain of my high school’s Quiz Bowl team– our post-match parties consisted of watching Team Member L do...
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Cry Me a River, Buy Me an Orange Bikini, and Get Over It
The other day, I posted this as my Facebook status: “My dream life pretty much consists of me sipping margies, reading my horoscope, and petting a dog in my backyard, while wearing a trashy orange...
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Can One Die of a Burrito Overdose?
Some days, you just need a burrito. Okay, okay– most days. In my humble opinion, burritos are the solution to any problem. Tough day at school or work? Burrito. Get in an argument with your...
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Need a Life Coach Who Can’t Even Handle Her Own Life?
Want advice from two boy-crazy, Mexican food-obsessed hot messes, who love personality drinks and have questionable taste in clothing? Email me at carrielaven@gmail.com– my friend Heather and I have...
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A Real Looker
“Well, you think that I’m pretty, and that’s all that matters. Oh, and your mom thinks that I’m pretty! But your mom has cataracts. And, come to think of it, you’re colorblind!” These guys, they...
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Pretty Penniless
Are you reading my articles on Broke-Ass Stuart’s Goddamn Website? Well, you should be. I offer nuggets of wisdom on fashion, work, dating, entertainment, and life in general… all while living on a...
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